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  • InsideTrack
  • March 11, 2010

    Behind the 'digital curtain.' Why face-to-face communication is still the best

    Tech-savvy Millennials and older Baby Boomers prefer face-to-face communication as the primary way to build relationships in the workplace. Remember, technology is just a tool.

    Michael Moore 

    Michael MooreWatch future issues of InsideTrack for Michael Moore’s series offering career and practice management advice in today’s economy. If you’d like Michael to address a particular issue, please contact him at mmoore@moores-law.com.   

    March 17, 2010 – The giant green head dominates the cavernous room. Sparks flash from the eyes and flames shoot up from the ground. Every booming word overwhelms the four individuals, meekly cowering before the scene. “The Great and Powerful Oz has spoken. You must bring me the witch’s broom. Now go!” In mortal fear, the Cowardly Lion bolts down the hall and leaps through a window. The Tin Man is reduced to a “clinking, clanking, clattering collection of kaligenous junk.” However, in spite of all his theatrics, the real Wizard of Oz was simply a person hiding behind technology. Are you doing the same?

    Face-to-face communication preferred

    Why should you bother working on interpersonal skills when most communication is by telephone, text message, and email? "Because face-to-face communication remains the most powerful human interaction," says Kathleen Begley, Ed.D., author of “Face-to-Face Communication, Making Human Connections in a Technology-Driven World.” “As wonderful as electronic devices are, they can never fully replace the intimacy and immediacy of people conversing in the same room.” This was supported in a 2009 survey by the IABC Research Foundation where both tech-savvy Millennials and older Baby Boomers said they prefer face-to-face communication as the primary way to build relationships in the workplace.

    Positive career impact

    The standard 8-hour job has been replaced by 24-hour accessibility. Organizations hand out cell phones, laptops and PDAs to employees so they can “telework” without even coming in to the office. Everyone is connected through email, text messaging, smart phones, and podcasts. Is mastery of all these tools really the best way to advance your career? Not according to a 2007 survey of 1,320 executives by recruiting firm Korn/Ferry International, where teleworkers were less likely to advance in their careers than people who went to work each day. Executives want face time. It’s difficult to promote people who are out of sight because they become out of mind. Not to mention many situations, often involving conflicts, high priority, or large amounts of money, that require people to sit down in the same room and share information. So while we all spend more hours working, if we don’t get the face time we may be missing out on career opportunities.

    Digital etiquette

    Communication may have changed since 1922 when Emily Post wrote "Etiquette in Society, in Business, in Politics and at Home," but politeness, kindness, respect, and discretion are still important. For example the simple thank you note may have been enhanced by technology. While certain situations still may require a handwritten note, email is acceptable for most others. I routinely use short email thank you notes to follow up with contacts, keep my name “top of mind” with prospective clients, and extend network opportunities. Here’s a few other digital Rules of Etiquette collected from a recent issue of Wired magazine:

    (1) Provide subjects for all emails.

    (2) Don’t follow more people on Twitter than follow you.

    (3) No more than 20 tweets in 24 hours.

    (4) Don’t type “BRB” (be right back). Just go and come back.

    (5) Never apologize for a lame tweet or blog post.

    (6) If your call drops, call back.

    (7) Ditch the Bluetooth earpiece if you’re not actually using it.

    (8) Don’t work all the time.

    Anger management

    A simple rule of thumb before responding to an email that makes you angry is, “Would you say it in person?” If not, don’t send it. Email can be a problematic communication tool because people do not have the benefit of body language and voice tone. Many experts suggest that body language alone makes up for as much as 80 percent of communication. Personally when an email hits my hot button, I force myself to wait 24 hours before sending a response. I may draft a hot response but never send it. Always offer to meet the person and talk face to face. Emails back and forth frequently make a bad situation worse. Never use offensive language in emails. Try to use an “I” statement as opposed to accusatory language. For example “I felt confused by your remarks,” instead of “You are a @@#$$@#$$.” Ask for clarification instead of jumping the gun.

    The last laugh

    Humor that works in person or even by phone sometimes doesn't work well online because the human contact that puts things into context is missing. With digital media, be careful how you use sarcasm, satire, potentially inappropriate humor, or anything else that might be misconstrued. Remember that anything you post or send in an email or even text message can be forever copied, stored, or forwarded and re-read and end up places you never imagined. When committing something to writing in the digital age, be sure it is something that you really want to say because it could potentially end up going to a much wider audience in the future.

    P2P the critical link in B2B

    According to CTIA, the Wireless Association, in 2007Americans sent close to 50 billion text messages per month. In 2008 that more than doubled to 110 billion text messages per month. However only face-to-face communication provides the opportunity to judge information through facial expression, body language, and tone of voice. That is why people-to-people (P2P) communication skills remain a primary career success factor in the business-to-business (B2B) world. Don’t rely solely on technology to share information, communicate ideas, and grow relationships.

    Remember, for personal career success, technology is just another tool and not your latest BFF.

    Michael Moore, Lewis and Clark 1983, is a professional coach for lawyers and the founder of Moore’s Law, Milwaukee. He specializes in marketing, client development, and leadership coaching for attorneys at all levels of experience. Moore also advises law firms on strategic planning and resource optimization. He has more than 25 years’ experience in private practice, as a general counsel, in law firm management, and in legal recruiting. For more information, visit www.moores-law.com.

    • Related: Lawyer resources in a down economy

    • Previous articles: In transition? Don’t let it bring you down; Effective networking and the lesson of the pot belly stove; Social networking means 33 million for lunch; The elevator speech: Who are you and why should I care?; How do you get more clients? Use the narrow focused request; New age lawyers: ‘We’re not in Kansas anymore, Toto’; Aligning your stars: The challenge of staff retention; Networking: How to work a room; ‘Trust me.’ Every lawyer’s need for personal credibility; Of mice and men: Why you need focus for success; Go ask Alive. Survival skills for career success.


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